You don’t have to have a family history of depression to have clinical depression. Clinical depression is VERY TREATABLE! You can get better, and therapists ( those who are more than just nice support people) and medication (prescribed by someone who knows what they are doing) definitely could save your life and make you want to live. Your bad feelings about how you treat your family is not enough reason to leave them – - You can get so you don’t do that any more. Your behavior is very likely related to how lousy you feel. There are ways to get to competent professionals. I’d help you out about that if you want.

I deal with people every day who have clinical depression and see them get satisfying,good lives. I’m not just making money off them. Poor therapists give therapy a bad name. A good therapists and the right medication does make a huge difference in lives. Mine for example. Been there.

Good therapists can do all kinds of things – show you how to deal with your thoughts and your emotions. Look into your history with you – read some of my blogs about how therapy helps.

You are contemplating hurting everyone who loves you and /or needs you and giving up on yourself. Then there’s no chance of you getting better. I think that is a really bad idea. You just haven’t experienced what therapy and meds can do. You don’t know what is available to you. Don’t you owe it to everyone involved to check this stuff out and not assume your prejudices are the end all truth? If you live in or around Madison, by all means call me. If you don’t – call a suicide hot line to start with it – you can find them in the phone book or look it up on the web under your town/ state.

I hope you give yourself and your family a chance.
Ann

Not that I abused her physically, I never have, but I think my excessive moodiness, ups and downs were like the psychological abuse of the cultists you mentioned in that article.

Interestingly, it also explains my relationships with several of my children.

Anyway, that led me to your depression articles.

Interesting that the comments to this post were extremely depressed. I felt sorry for them.

Anyway, hopelessness makes depression sound wimpy to me. It’s semantics, I know.

Other than a family history of depression (none that I am aware of, that is) I, too, am all of the above.

As for your “find a therapist” solution, I don’t think paying someone to listen to my boring tale of “woe is me” will solve anything except maybe help their cash flow.

I am currently crafting my goodbyes and am fairly certain Sunday will be my last day. We’ll see.

Thanks for your insights.

Take your courage in your own two hands and check out my article on How to Choose the Right Therapist. I see people make changes in their lives and become a lot happier — all the time, every day. Go for what you want – you deserve it.